Anger is a necessary emotion. It gives us information. Whether it is frustration, annoyance, rage, righteous indignation or fury, it lets us know that we have been harmed or wronged. This is a sort of flaming anger, and the color is yellow or red. But there is a deeper sort of anger. The color is blue, and remember that’s the hottest flame, but also the color of frozen ice. The deepest level of Dante’s hell, in fact was frozen.
The theologican Frederick Buechner wrote: “Of the Seven Deadly Sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back — in many ways it is a feast fit for a king. The chief drawback is that what you are wolfing down is yourself. The skeleton at the feast is you.”
There’s also a saying that “revenge is a dish best served cold.” If this is “making your blood run cold,” there’s a reason. Bitterness and resentment freeze you. It’s a form of slow death.
If we don’t manage our anger as it occurs, repressing it or suppressing it, or expressing it in wrong ways, we harm ourselves and we harm others. It can build up and take us over, even if we aren’t aware of. Anger turned inward is one definition of depression. Another is hostility, cynicism and rigidity. Anger that can’t flow becomes dammed up and our Inner Wisdom expresses it through flash outbursts, indigestion, migraines, aches and pains, high blood pressure, exhaustion or low-grade incipient bad health. You simply never feel good, and that is a living hell. Anger, both alive and buried, has been linked to most diseases, especially heart attacks.
There has to be some healthy outlet for all this, and we all have had our reasons for anger and resentment. I’ve never talked to a client who didn’t. Whether it’s the man who used you, the promotion that went to someone else, the chance you never had to go to college, years of service to children who ignore or abuse you, the book that never got published, or your inheritance that was promised to you and went to someone else … these things linger if not addressed properly and can turn us into bitter people. Bitter and brittle.
How you talk to yourself about these things is important. The 12-steppers say, “It isn’t what’s happening to me, it’s how I’m taking it.” You have a story to tell, that you must tell, and let’s say you can write a different ending. It helps very much to tell your story to someone else too, but the right person. They can give you perspective and help you make sense out of what has happened. More importantly, it frees up energy for the rest of your beautiful journey. Telling your story to the right person who knows about this sort of thing can be freeing.
Whatever your story is, it isn’t over, and if you will delve into this you will find love all around. As a counselor, coach and astrologer, I like to help clients see the karma behind all this. There are patterns but it’s important to realize that while there is karma, there is also always free will.
What you inherited from past lives, or your nuclear family needs to be addressed in a caring way so that you can move on to the life you deserve and love.
It can be a close inheritance – a family where conflict, aggression and competition were more important than love and acceptance. The charts of these people show Aries influence. It can be a spouse that abused you and left you poisoned for all relationships. Those charts feature Scorpio. It can be your grandmother’s treatment of your mother than she unconsciously passed on to you, a Neptunian issue. It can be the death of your child that left your heart frozen, an afflicted Leo chart.
One of the most important things you can do for yourself – and for YOUR children – is to end these old patterns, family inheritances and bad karma. An excellent book about this is Erin Sullivan’s “Family Patterns”.
So open your heart again to a new world. When you work with a psychic and astrologer, you can understand the nature of what you have inherited – both the curses and the blessings – and see how they work and don’t work in your life.
If you ever caught yourself doing something you hate and said, “That’s just what my mother used to do,” this is for you. But it is often more buried and subtle than this and your chart and the cards can pull out the essence for you, so you can get to the bottom of it. It is a relief.
Recall again that anger burns and is active, while resentment festers and eats you up. If you’ve come to the point where you realize nothing has worked in getting rid of your bad moods and depression, it’s time to UN-depress all this karma, bring it out into the light, let the energy move – and move ON. Anger motivates because it tells us something is wrong. Then, if we have labeled it correctly, we have the chance to take ACTION to rectify the situation, but most of all, we have energy to get on with our life. This works for old things, clearing the slate, giving you a second chance, and freeing you from the karma.
Sometimes it’s as simple as realizing — really “getting” — that you are experiencing things you did to others in former lifetimes so you can learn and move on.
Some of this you can work through with those who are still present. It is also possible to continue relationships with those who have crossed to the other plane. Let your psychic advisor guide you in ways to do this with love. The answer is not to spread more hate and anger, but to open yourself to love.
In other cases, the keys lie in your astrological chart. If you feel you can no longer go on as things are, it’s time to pull things out of the deep freeze, thaw them out and give yourself back your life. If you suppress one emotion, you suppress them all. Until you can deal gracefully with the hurts and pains, allowing the tears to flow, and the grief to come forward, you cannot experience joy, pleasure and happiness.
Contact me for a reading for help with this at semiramis.appiamo@hotmail.com .
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